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The Midas Stockmarket
Formula
LEVESON - THE
MUSICAL
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Thanks to Ali Cagdas Tuna for reminding us about
this
really interesting Horizon programme.
Send your favourites to admin@nakedtrader.com...
but make sure we
can publish it!
Our Twitter pal @
Scrataliano (Trader & Futures
Analyst)
Tweeted this to us.
BRILLIANT!!
__________________
IT'S HENRY JENNINGS - BUT NOT AS WE KNOW
HIM..
JUMPIN JACK FLASH
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My mate asked, "What would you do if you had Richard Branson's
money?" I said, "Probably spend it before he noticed it was
missing."
_____________________________
Probe into Japanese bathtub fatalities after 14,000 die in one
year
According to the figures,
4,612 people died as a result of traffic accidents across the
nation in 2011.
The Ministry of Health,
Labour and Welfare announced the first nation-wide study into bath
fatalities after a number of local authorities began collecting
statistics that point to a high number of victims being
elderly.
The high number of bath
deaths can be traced back to the role the bath plays in Japanese
families and society. The ritual of bathing in Japan is less about
washing but more about relaxing at the end of the working day and,
in more traditional communities and older buildings, keeping warm
in the winter.
Local authorities' data
suggests most of the deaths were attributable to drowning, heart
palpitations, heart attacks and subarachnoid haemorrhages, the
Mainichi newspaper reported.
The numbers rose
significantly in the winter months, when older people move from a
warm part of their home to the bathroom and suffer "thermal
shock."
The government was asked to
look into the problem by a number of domestic organisations devoted
to bathing and the effects on health, including the Japanese
Society of Balneology, Climatology and Physical Medicine, and to
support research that will reduce the number of deaths caused by
taking a bath.
Authorities are being urged
to draw up guidelines on how to take a bath safely, encouraging
people to avoid excessive changes in temperatures, gradually and
carefully soaking oneself in hot water and drinking lots of
fluids.
Source: http://tinyurl.com/8xguzp5
Angela Merkel arrives at passport control at Athens
Airport. 
"Nationality?" asks the Immigration
officer.
"German," she replies.
"Occupation?" he asks.
"No, just visiting for a few days."
[ Back to Top >> ]
THESE ARE SO
CHEESY - THE DESERVE THE WHOLE COLUMN
I changed my i Pod name to
Titanic. It's syncing now.
When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
seasoned
veteran.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop
any time.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on
me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but
I'd
never met herbivore.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity . I can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on
words.
They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type- O.
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop
quiz.
Energizer battery arrested. Charged with battery.
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because
she
couldn't control her pupils?
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four
seconds.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit
me!
Broken pencils are pointless.
I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A
thesaurus.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen.
Police
have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
Velcro - what a rip off!
Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
Venison for dinner? Oh deer!
Earthquake in Washington obviously government's fault.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.